A Long Month - A Great Friend

This has been a long, long month and it really only started getting long and hard on the 15th.  I will never really forget the moment.  Jim got a phone call from Bishop Lundquist.  He was actually still in bed.  I heard him say "Richard Jensen?" and I had the worst feeling ever. 
Richard had been in Idaho working on the school house.  He went for an early morning walk or jog and was found on the side of the road about 6:40 am.  He had a massive heart attack.  I do not think that words could ever express how profoundly this affect our lives and how much it will affect us for so many years to come. 

Richard and Susan are surely our closest friends ever.  Jim and Richard have always enjoyed each other's company and this was a blessing since Susan and I hit it off so well right from the beginning.  Susan and I worked in Relief Society together and then in Young Women.  Jim and Richard enjoyed music and started their trio with Zhailaa and then later with Abi.  We loved to play Hearts and other games together.  We took a number of trips including the California Coast in Cuyucas one winter, cruise to Mexico, cruise to Alaska, several weekend trips to Salt Lake City during Christmas and also a week in Hawaii, several days in Park City and a week in Southern California.  We were planning for some time in Hilo, Hawaii at a beach house that the Jensens had access to.  We often said that we were glad we took those trips together even though we couldn't really afford them - and we especially appreciate that time now that we can no longer do it.

My heart has hurt so badly these last weeks:  for Richard of course and yet I know that he is in a better place and is happy.  I grieve for those of us left behind... Susan will suffer for forever I am sure.  She is going to be sad every day and no one will ever be able to replace her husband in her life.

I know that Jim is feeling such a great loss.  Richard was his best friend ever.  I can remember hearing him often on the phone calling just to chat and laughing with Richard about something or other.  They both enjoyed their times on the stage and even their times when we would just be together and Richard would bring out the guitar or uke and start playing and they would start singing "The Fish Song" or some other favorite.  It was a source of great joy for Jim.

All of our kids have expressed thoughts of love and appreciation for the Jensens.  Uncle Richie was always so interested in them and took time to express how he cared whenever he saw them.  He was Laura's first Sunday School teacher in New Harmony and she has loved him ever since.  He always cared about Amy and David as well as the other boys.  He just had a way of making others feel important and cared about.  We spent some great times with the Jensens and I am glad for Amy's wedding at their house where we were able to gather as a family at their home and enjoy such a beautiful setting for the reception.

I have thought about how being with Richard has had an affect on my life as well.  We kidded each other a lot.  He liked to see me get riled up with Jim and would often laugh when the teasing started.  I don't know that I ever really let my guard down around other men except my family and being with Richard and Susan let me be me comfortably.  They are like family and will forever be so.  I always knew he loved us... not just Jim but me and Jim.  He was a great friend whose memory I will cherish and reverence.  He set a great example of service and kindness. 

I do not believe that he thought of himself as any great man.  He didn't acknowledge his great talents as anything special and yet he created such beautiful items, he sang with such a clear and lovely voice, he played the guitar and ukelele without ever making a mistake.  He was a great teacher and a good leader.  He was willing to serve no matter what the need.  He enjoyed people and they were drawn to him because of his sincerity and brotherly love.

I guess life will go on without him but not without his influence and the blessings we have received from knowing him.  I will forever be grateful for the times we have spent over these last years.  We will watch over Susan and try to help fill her lonely moments.  We will try to bring some joy to her life and help her in any way we can.  She is as dear as a sister to both Jim and I.  It will be our pleasure to share our time with her... we are planning on a round of 5 Crowns this week.  At least we won't have to worry that Richard will whoop us like he usually did!

NEVER TO BE FORGOTTEN

Jim and I were driving last night and I started remembering names of people in Yerington for some reason.  It was an interesting process since we haven't lived in Yerington for over 35 years and when we lived there it was only for about 1 1/2 years.  Even so, we made some amazing relationships there.  We lived in a little house to begin with which had linoleum through out and we rented it from the people across the street.  It had a front yard that was surrounded by chain link fence and had a patio.  Jim and John would play in that front yard much of the day since we lived there during the summer months from May to I think November.  Jim was about 2 1/2 and John was 10 months when we moved in and Peter was born that next October.
Memories I have of Yerington are wonderful.  The ward was truly our family.  They made us feel welcomed from the beginning.  We were raising money for an addition and so we had monthly dinners for the town.  We got to know so many people well... and as I was going through names, I realized that I had been in and visiting in every home. 
Ted and Elaine had a ranch just out of town and had bought some buildings in town which housed a laundromat in one.  They had a couple who worked for them and we got to know them well - Brian and Shirley Millard.  They had just joined the church and had two little boys at the time.  We ate at their home several times and I remember they harvested wild asparagus out of their irrigation ditches by the home where they lived.
Jim was the Venturer (I believe) leader and he made a movie with those boys during the second summer we were there.  The boys included a couple of Beutlers, Cal Archer, Norman & Greg Rempp and brothers, Stanley Moyle, Glade Barton.  They went to the mines and other places out of town and had the best time. 
I was the Mother Education teacher and also the Primary President.  Jim also served as a Seventy which at that time was the missionary arm and I believe he was very involved in the Stake.  We were busy and besides being busy in the church we had a baby, Peter, and moved and Jim changed jobs 3 or 4 times.  He also broke "off" his ankle playing baseball the second summer and was in a full cast from toe to hip for a number of weeks after having surgery. 
It was special to remember the name of so many friends:  Phil and Nancy Turner, the Talbots, Bill and Pat Green (our Bishop), Janice Tamagnis, Arch and Edwina Archer, the Beutlers, the Bartons, George Bowman and Marla, Robin?(still working on this one), Celia and Maury Moyle, Ted & Yvonne Rempp, John and Lee Reed, Larry Sargent ..
We attended a monthly study group with many of these people, we went to dinner at a lot of these homes; we baby sat some of their kids, they babysat ours;  Jim played ball on the ward team.  Their kids would just take our little boys and play with them.  I barely knew them but they made us feel apart of their lives from the beginning.  It was an incredible experience and when we left, they made a King size quilt for us with squares from many of the families that lived there.
Jim mentioned as we were reminiscing that it was a time that he will never forget... nor I.  We thought we had some challenges when we lived there - I think we have gone on to find that life had many more and tougher challenges that we have faced since but we learned so much and loved the opportunity to share with people we have not yet forgotten....

AMY AMY AMY

I didn't get a chance to write about Amy's wedding so now that things are simmering down, I think I will take a moment and say a few things.

It was a beautiful day for the wedding and especially the reception.  We were worried that we might have rain but it was a perfect night.  Amy and Laura made most of the food and Amy chose to also have snowcones which were a big hit.  The colors were bright and fun and the Jensen's yard was perfect.  We had a good turnout of people although I have had many since tell me they were sorry they had to miss the event due to being somewhere else etc.  Well, we were glad for who could celebrate with us.

The temple ceremony in the big room off of the Celestial room, couldn't have been more perfect.  A son of Bruce R. McConkie sealed Amy and Dad.  He told them of some wonderful promises and spoke of the covenants they were making as man and wife.  Both Dan's family and our family filled the room.

All of our children and almost all of their spouses were there in the temple.  It was a sacred moment for me as their mother to witness their devotion to the gospel and commitment to covenants they have each made.  What a blessing that was for both Jim and I.  It was a tender mercy!

I am proud of Amy and the worthy life she has led to qualify her for a temple marriage.  She has always tried to live the gospel and has made a great effort to keep the commandments, to dress modestly, to attend and serve in the church.  I am especially pleased with her as a married woman.  We went to her house in Springville on Saturday and I think she has done such a great job decorating her little basement apartment.  Everything was so neat and orderly and her decorations were darling.  On Sunday we went back and had dinner with her and Dan as well as Laura and Nigel, Shey and Donnie.  We had one of our favorites, Shoyu Chicken and rice and she did a great job having everything ready and waiting for us.  There is a special, sweet spirit in her home.

I couldn't be happier for her.  I know that she is starting our her married life in a great way.  I am so glad that she and Dan are so happy and that they are both committed to their temple marriage!

Letter to Kathy Hellberg

Wrote this up-date letter to Kathy Hellberg after she wrote me a birthday card...

Kathy:

I am thanking you for several things.  #1 gift card to Amy and Dan. It was a delightful wedding and we had a good time.  I was so relieved to have it all done and that it didn't rain on the outdoor reception. 

#2 Birthday card and wishes to me and update on your family!  It was great to hear about your grandsons and your girls & spouses.  I intend to bring Jim out there one day so he can meet all of you and enjoy a vacation as I did (now long ago).
#3 Your email address which I believe is new from the one I had.  I had my email hacked about 6 months ago and although I wrote a letter to my email friends I never got around to mailing it.  Therefore I haven't had an email for you and like you do not spend time on facebook.
I thought I would fill you in on our latest:
We have opened a cute little shop and cafe in Cedar City.  It is a fun venture for me - I am patterning it after a New Hope kind of shop.  I take in consignment items that involve things from antiques to handcrafted items.  I never know what will come in next and my greatest fun is to decorate them on the shelves, tables etc. that I have.  I also make fudge that we sell in all kinds of flavors - maplenut, chocolate pecan, island rocky road, butterscotch penuche, pistachio... you give us an idea and we'll try it.  Jim is the inventor and he does very well in his creations.  I also make goodie baskets and have fun putting those together. 

Besides the shop is also the cafe which has been a huge success for lunchtime crowds.  We mostly make sandwiches and use a foccacia (seasoned) bread for things like pulled turkey w/ jalepeno raspberry jam, chicken salad, BLT, etc.  Or we do a variety of grilled cheese on sourdough:  3 cheese w/sliced asian pear, 3 cheese w/ bacon and guacamole.  We also do a lot of grilled sandwiches like The Thunderbird which is on a hogie bun with grilled chicken, bell pepper, mushroom, onion and cheese w/ lettuce, tomato and red onion; or the Philly which is similar accept w/ beef... plus several others like a Ruben, hot pastrami, loaded pastrami.
It has been fun to try new sandwiches out and see how people like them.  We have some great salads and wraps as well.  In a central Utah small town we are something unique and people are enjoying our menu.

So obviously that is keeping us busy, busy, busy. 

John is working with us.  He moved here from Florida when he and his wife were divorced 2 years ago.  She decided she didn't want to do the fulltime mom thing and went back to Alaska to go to school.  He brought his 3 kids here and is doing very well.  I am working hard to find him a new wife! He has one girl Natalie who is now 12, Jack who is 8 and Andy who is 6. 

Dave also works for us while going to school.  I think he has one more year because he keeps changing his major. Dani works for a dentist here in town - she got her degree in business two years ago.  Amy worked for us as well but will move to Provo Utah while her husband finishes up school there at UVU

Laura and her family are in Salt Lake where her husband is getting his MBA at the University of Utah in finance.  They have two cute little kids - Sheylani who just turned six and will go to first grade and Donovan who will be two in October.
We enjoy seeing them as often as we can and Amy and Laura will just be about 45 minutes apart...they are very good friends so this will be great to them.

Mike is in Wyoming and still going to school.  He drives a school bus and I think would love to do that the rest of his life if he could... He is aiming towards and degree in business as well.  His wife, Liana, is the sweetest thing.  She also is working on a degree in family therapy and works at their local hospital.  She would quit it all in a minute if she could get pregnant but hasn't been able to yet.  They will have been married 4 years in August.

Jim is still in North Las Vegas where he still works for the same law firm he has been with for 8 or so years.  His kids are growing up:  Marien 15, Clayton will be 14 in August, and Kathryn is 11.  Clorinda keeps busy tutoring math and getting the kids to all of their activities since Las Vegas has a school system where the kids can go to magnetic schools that focus on certain curriculums - Marien goes across town to a Rancho for medical prep. something or other.  Clayton went to another special school in Henderson which is in the other direction... Kathryn will start middle school this year but I believe that both she and Clayton will be staying in their "neighborhood" schools this year.

Pete is in Houston.  I went to visit them in May.  Pete works for Shell Oil.  They just had their fourth baby this last month - June 26th. He was 3 weeks early so it was great he came and Pete and their daughter Abbie (8) were able to come for Amy's wedding. They have 4 children:  Jeremy (10), Abbie, Ben (5) and new little Oliver Charles.  Pete's wife Tara is amazing and takes great care of the kids and their home.  It is always fun to visit them - she takes such good care of us!  Abbie will be baptized in August and the baby will be blessed so both Jim and I are going for a few days.

Jay is finishing up at animation school (online) where he has been working for the last 18 mos.  He is hoping to find a job in animation anywhere!  He has been designing t-shirts since he got his degree in fine art 8 years ago for a tshirt company called Duck Company.  He has also taught classes at the university here in Cedar but wants to move into this new opportunity.  They are looking forward to a move somewhere.  He and Sara have 6 children:  Mackenzie (12), Tara (10) twins Jaykob and Jayson (9) Anna (4) and Tommy (2)  Sara is a great mom and does all the homemaker stuff like great desserts, homemade bread.  I like living by her, we have a good time together - got pedicures for my birthday even!

Might also mention that I hear from Kelly now and then.  She is living in Iowa now and managing a museum.  She said she is working 60 hour weeks but I think she likes it.  Both of her girls live nearby.  Cammie and her husband, and Bronwynne and her baby, Taryn, who is about 8 mos. old - I think she lives with Kelly and Mike.

So look what your letter brought you....  Thanks for writing. 

Let's keep in touch!!!

Love you forever - Kathy 

Big #62

Received this email from Kelly for my birthday.  Thought I would publish it and my reply...

---

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR SISTER!   Are we still allowing those?? Well, have a happy day anyway. I often think of you and how much you taught me growing up. Thanks for being a great "big" sister.   I hope things are going well for you. Congradulations to Amy and hubby - He looks like he will fit right into the Fontano Clan. (I can find the picture but not the invitation!) Kath, you and Jim should be proud of your kids - all married in the temple, all knowing what i smost important and going forward in the gospel. I am sure yesterday was a beautiful day for you.   what is going on with the rest of your bunch? I thought you were beating me in the grandkid count - but now we are at 18 and 1 great due in December. Davydd and Candace are expecting in August  (18) and Tosha (oldest granddaughter) is expecting in December. (I love these kids, just wish that they would get the marriage taken care of first!) Kami & Seth are not able to get pregnant and it is very depressing for her. Of course having Taryn in my life is a blessing I am grateful for every day. I keep praying that her mother will catch on to the gospel. She goes to church with us all the time, but really doesn't allow herself to be a part of it. It is an unusual situation, but as long as we live together, she will go, but she won't pray with us or study scriptures or discuss the gospel at all. She just got a job, so that wil help me out with the financial struggle - I hope. With the way things are set up, you never know if getting work will help or set you up to lose benefits like WIC and medicaid for the baby. We are hoping that this will allow her to keep medical coverage for Taryn and WIC but allow her to pay off school debts and get a car. I am teaching RS again. It is about all I can handle with work which is taking about 60 to 75 hours per week. Of course, since we are in a branch - that means that I teach almost every week and lead the music. All I didn't do in RS today was say the opening prayer and conduct and this was my week off! But we have a great group of sisters and I love it. Mike has been called as 2nd counselor in the branch presidency. It is his first leadership calling since we've been married and he is terrified. I think it will be great for him, but quite new and different. He is most comfortable teaching. He is looking for work still. This economy and not having training in a business setting and being too old to do physical labor is really hard. Ah well, life is still good and happy. God bless you and all yours. and have a Happy Birthday. Make Jim take you somewhere else to eat besides your own place!! Love you. Kelly

Well I already ate lunch at the LBH and I know he will take me to the Garden House for Prime Rib which is my favorite!  So no worries for Birthday dinner.

All the kids were here and in the temple for Amy's wedding so that is the best birthday present ever!  Yes they are all active and have strong testimonies - don't know what we did right but they have all chosen well.  We are at grandchild #19 as Pete and Tara had their baby boy , Oliver Charles, last week (3 weeks early) and that was great because Pete and his little Abbie were able to come to the wedding.  I feel very blessed!

Jim and his family will be coming to Nauvoo in a couple of weeks... do you live near enough for him to come and see you or you to meet him?  I don't know what day for sure but this is his email:  jimfontano@yahoo.com and if you will contact him perhaps he can make arrangements.  He definitely wants to see you if it is possible. 

Big Jim's sister Judy passed away with a brain tumor last week - she found out on Mother's day and so she went quickly.  It was a bitter sweet day of course - seeing relatives but also saying goodbye to a very good woman.  

We are busy at the shop - I bet we are actually doing similar things only you know what you are doing and I just guess most of the time.  I love the arranging and coordinating - it is something that I have loved since we were little and Mom and Lucy were both so into antiques.  I feel blessed to have this opportunity but I do know that my age plays a part in what I can do or not do.  I met a lady today who is celebrating her 55th anniversary this week and she looked fantastic and the thought crossed my mind that I hope I am strong like her when I make it to her age... if I do.  This business will either keep me young or kill me so we'll see!

You mentioned teaching and everything else in RS - you go girl!  They have put me in YW again as a MM counselor to a 25 year old amazing girl.  All the other workers are also in their 20s and I am sure they just as soon leave me alone but I am doing okay with the girls (they think of me as their grandma) and so I guess some of my experience helps out.  We have girls camp this week and I have gotten out of going all week - just Weds and Thurs.  I am afraid of the 7000' altitude and what it might do to my heart so I have just bowed out of sleeping over.  I have never been to a better camp in my moving around than Liahona - I think we were so lucky to go up there...who knew I would still be going to girls camp at the age of 62!

Jim and I are doing okay.  Keeping busy at the shop.  Today he made chocolate and carrot cake big cupcakes as well as Chocolate satin pie.  He loves to do all that but whines about it at the same time.  He struggles with his back and hips and all of that but is an asset to the business because he is such a people person and drums us up business etc.  We will miss Amy being there (she is moving to Orem) but on the other hand there has been a lot of family involved in making decisions and having differences of opinion so perhaps one less "family" member int he management might not be too bad.

Well, thanks for my email, it made my day.  I love and appreciate you.  Some day I hope we can spend some time together.  It would be a delight.  Congrats on all your grandchildren - especially having a little one living with you is a blessing (although Donovan - Laura's youngest is now 20 mos. and is already in his terrible twos)  He spilled bleach on my carpet and lost my remote on his last visit.  Whew, glad she is able to take him home!

Love you so much, Kathy

Time flies - things happen

So many things have happened since my last blog entry in April.  The time has literally flown.  Most noteworthy are Amy's Engagement for wedding on July 7th, spending time with Pete and Tara and kids in Houston and finding out that they are expecting a new baby boy in July, getting a call to YW again and having the opportunity to work with young girls and sharing my testimony with them, and finally this last week end attending Jenna's wedding to James Lee and finding out at the same time that Judy was not going to recover from her brain surgery. 
Judy passed away this last Tuesday.  Both Jim and I had the feeling that she would pull through this but seeing her Sunday night following the wedding and then hearing that she had gone back to the hospital because of the terrible pain she was enduring on Monday, we were really  not too surprised when Joy called and said she had passed away on Tuesday.  The viewing and funeral will be next Sunday (July 1) and Monday (July 2)which we will attend.
I was able to sit next to Carrie during the dinner at Jenna's wedding and had a nice visit with her although neither of us was particularly in a celebratory mood.  She is a lovely woman and it is hard to watch her go through this great loss.  I sent her and similar letters (to her brothers and Dale) and wanted to attach these to this blog for future reference.

Dear Carrie:

We just wanted to write and express our sympathy and love to you at this time.  We know that it is very difficult for you to lose your mother and that the next months will be sad.  We hope you are strengthened by memories of her influence and example.

She was such a strength and help in your life (and in our lives as well). 

She always set a great example of service, hard work, good thoughts, sweet concern and so many other qualities.

She was an achiever and worked hard to be well educated. 

She was such a great mother and grandmother.  She taught us so much about parenthood in our younger years. 

She was a great organizer and was always involved in some project or other.

She was a good neighbor and had many friends.

She was giving to others.

She was very talented and used her talents to bless so many people.

She knew how to have a good time and always wanted to include you and your families in activities that would strengthen you and keep you close.

She was a great older sister to Jim and he loves her so much.  He often tells stories of when they were young and their parents would go to this or that event and Judy would take care of him.  I know he loved those times.

We will miss your mom so much.  We recognize that she is having a joyful reunion with those who have gone before but even so it is hard for those she left behind.  We will be praying for you and for your children as well as for your dad and your brothers and their families. 

I am so glad we had that time together at the wedding to just visit and catch up.  Your Uncle Jim and I think the world of you and we know that you are doing a great work with your beautiful children.  We know that you are your mother’s daughter and that because of you and your great brothers, her legacy will live on and many people will be blessed.

Love always,  Aunt Kathy and Uncle Jim

 

Here's to Great Bloggers!

Just spent some time reading Liana and John's blogs.  I haven't read them for awhile... seems I've been too busy watching "Biggest Loser" or something else each evening.  Tonight, I sat down and started to read and enjoyed them so much.  Liana has such a gift for writing and I love her comments about life with Mike.  I loved her story about taking her YW to YW Conference and how they ended up with seats in the Conference Center and everything worked out so perfectly even though she was in such a panic about it the week before. 
John writes such enjoyable anecdotes about the kids.  It is great to read about the things that they come up with... most recently Jack forgetting to wear his underwear and then using that as an excuse not to have to go get his shoes from outside.  Also his visit with his Bishop for his Baptism interview.  He is such a great dad and works so hard to take care of all the needs of his family.
While I have been writing, Jim has been parading back and forth in his garments and white socks and slippers.  I told him I didn't want to see his outfit one more time.  He gets such a kick out of hmself!
Not much to say but did want to remember how much I enjoyed the trip to the temple with grandkids to do baptisms.  It was a great experience.  Very spiritual and an blessing to see my grandchildren participating in the temple.  Also enjoyed watching Tara and Kathryn all dressed up in the "wedding dresses from Mike and Liana's wedding"... go over to the visitors center while we were in the baptistry.  It was just such a cute thing.
I also might mention that I have been called toYW again as the Mia Maid Counselor.  It is a challenge to try to fit in with a young presidency and with the girls.  I think that some of them might be a little afraid of me since I am so old.  I am going to work at it though.  I always enjoy the young men too.  We have quite a few in Greenslake - like 17 girls or so and probably that many boys. It is pretty cool considering that Greenslake when we started the ward 5 years ago only had 4 or 5 YW and not many more YM than that. 
I am fasting for some of these girls right now.. I hope that they will choose to be active and that I can help them gain testimonies of the Savior and feel His love.  Having done this so many times it seems odd that it would be such a challenge for me but I find each time to be a challenge and I appreciate the opportunity to stretch myself yet again.  My Patriarchal blessing says I will be a leader of the youth and with this being about the 10th or maybe more time I have been in a presidency I guess that is bearing itself out.  Grateful for the chance to serve.